Handbook for an Unpredictable Life: How I Survived Sister Renata and My Crazy Mother, and Still Came Out Smiling (with Great Hair) by Perez Rosie

Author:Perez, Rosie [Perez, Rosie]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
ISBN: 9780307952417
Publisher: Crown Publishing Group
Published: 2014-02-25T00:00:00+00:00

“Get in the car, Barbra!” laughed Grace.

“Barbra! Do I sound like her? Do I—”

“Stop! Go! Now!”

I hung out with Grace constantly. I couldn’t wait to come home and share my day with her. She taught me how to bake better than the nuns without standing over my shoulder barking orders. She introduced me to Charles Dickens and Emily Brontë—which were tough reads and depressed the hell out of me, but I loved them. She checked my “attitude” without making me feel defensive, then later praised the slightest improvements I’d make. She made me feel okay about being a cornball—seriously. We just hung out, you know? We enjoyed each other’s company and had fun.

When all was beginning to get right with the world, Grace decided to leave—not only the Group Home, but the order too! She didn’t want to be a nun anymore. She had met a man and fallen in love. Scandalous! Although inspired by her choice to listen to her heart, I was seriously broken up by her departure. I remember her sitting with just me the day she was leaving, saying everything was going to be okay, things would carry on. Nothing helped ease the pain—except for Freckles, who became everything to me even more after that. The other girls thought my “obsession” with Freckles was weird. I didn’t care. I would disappear with her for hours, walking through the woods and singing happy songs to cheer myself up before I got back to the house. (My pride prevented me from showing how affected I was.)

After Grace left, we went through several different Group Home parents.

There were Abby and Michael, wholesome and very Americana—cheerleader marries soft-spoken jock.

We had three new girls from the Home after one of the original girls left, another got pregnant and married, and the aunt of another took custody of her and brought her home. These new girls were much more hard-core and gave Abby and Michael hell.

One night, as retaliation for a punishment, the three new girls snuck downstairs after dark and taped Kotex pads stained with ketchup on their door to spell out “fuck you”—a new low point for sure.

Abby and Michael were pretty much gone after that.

Then came Priscilla and Elvis.

Priscilla was mushy fat, and Elvis was skinny as a rail. Most of us couldn’t stand either of them. Priscilla had gotten into a fight with one of my half-sisters. Elvis stepped in and put my half-sister in a bear hug. My sister flipped out. Scared, I grabbed the kitchen knife, stood up on the dining-room chair, and pointed it at Priscilla’s throat, telling her she better tell her husband to let go of my sister or else. Priscilla, not threatened in the slightest, rolled her eyes and told me to get down. I sheepishly backed away and quickly apologized—feeling like an idiot.

They were gone shortly after that.

Next came Sharon and Bobby, two Italian American sweethearts from Long Island. We all felt that these two actually cared about us. Sharon was great.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.